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Category Archives: Wakey Wakey!

Bloody Obvious Alert: David Brooks Calls Out Romney as a Phony

22 Sep

So New York Times columnist David Brooks was on the NewsHour and said out loud what everyone else already knew: Mitt Romney is faking it.

“Several decades ago I had a chance to have dinner with Tom Clancy, the thriller writer,” Brooks said. “And he sat down — he had just toured a battleship and he had seen a new weapon system. And he was bubbling over with excitement about this new weapon system he thought was very interesting. And he was just talking about it with great passion. And I remember thinking, ‘You can’t fake it. If you don’t feel that, you can’t write Tom Clancy novels.’”

“And with Mitt Romney, he’s faking it,” Brooks continued. “I think he’s a non-ideological guy running in an ideological age who is pretending to be way more ideological than he really is. And so he talks like he is this cartoon image of how I’m supposed to be talking and as a result, it is stupid half the time — not half the time, some of the time. It’s an impersonation. And so, if I — knowing it’s too late to change who he is running as, but just be the more boring manager you are. He’s a competent manager — we thought he was.”

Look, Barack Obama is going to be reelected. I’ve been saying this to strangers in the street ever since the Republicans took the House. (Granted, I may be proved wrong if something goes wildly wrong in the Middle East. I mean even wronger than what’s going on now. In which case I will delete this post and deny ever saying that Obama was going to reelected, which I’m only going on record as saying in the event that actually happens.) And the president’s a phony too, playing like he’s some kind of centrist, when in fact, if he had his druthers, which let’s hope to mercy he never has, he would redistribute the fillings in your teeth to Pakistani metal workers and then apologize for Americans’ good oral hygiene. (While funneling taxpayer money to the likes of Solyndra. Quick question: how much energy does it take to clean up the mess of a failed green-energy company? And how much green?) Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on September 22, 2012 in The Best of What's Left, Told You, Wakey Wakey!, Well That's Depressing, Your Tax Dollars at Work

 

Paul and Ringo Reunite, Forget Why, End Up Singing Partridge Family Tunes

05 Apr

maharishiNow THAT I would pay for.

We could hear Paul McCartney tuning up behind the curtain for his headlining set at the David Lynch Foundation’s “Change Begins Within” benefit concert. Ringo Starr had played a rollicking mini-set of his own just a few minutes earlier. Still, there had been no rock-solid confirmation that the two living Beatles would perform together last night. When Dern and Lynch walked off and the curtain went up, it was for Macca to play a Beatles-heavy solo show (full set list after the jump). He was in high spirits and excellent form. But we all got what we were really waiting for at the end of McCartney’s set, when he introduced an old mate named Billy Shears to join him on “With A Little Help From My Friends.” It’s a good thing Radio City has such a powerful sound system. Otherwise you’d never have heard the Fab Two singing that familiar melody together over the crowd’s wild roar.

What exactly is the David Lynch Foundation? Let the director of Blue Velvet, Lost Highway, and Mulholland Drive tell you himself:

I have been “diving within” through the Transcendental Meditation technique for over 30 years. It has changed my life, my world. I am not alone. Millions of other people of all ages, religions, and walks of life practice the technique and enjoy incredible benefits.

Someday, hopefully very soon, “diving within” as a preparation for learning and as a tool for developing the creative potential of the mind will be a standard part of every school’s curriculum. The stresses of today’s world are taking an enormous toll on our children right now. There are hundreds of schools, with thousands of students, who are eager to relieve this stress and bring out the full potential of every student by providing this Consciousness-Based education today.

Our Foundation was established to ensure that any child in America who wants to learn and practice the Transcendental Meditation program can do so.

Now what’s creepier — children doing TM or the midget in Twin Peaks?

TM is the registered trademark of the Maharishi Foundation, which is rooted in the teachings of the Maharish Mahesh Yogi, whom the Beatles paid a famous visit to in 1967.

TM teachers and at least one organization connected with the practice have been the object of an investigation by the Cult Awareness Network and civil lawsuits.

Maybe I wouldn’t be so cynical if I had gotten that business degree from Maharishi University. (BTW: If you’re an American seeking a master’s, you won’t have to pay a dime in tuition! Student loans after the fact, we-e-e-e-l-l-l …)

 
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Posted by on April 5, 2009 in These Kids Today With the Long Hair and Crazy Music, This Is So Not Good, Wakey Wakey!

 

Bishop Vows to Investigate Historicity of Holocaust, Once He’s Done Looking into ‘This Gravity Nonsense’

10 Feb

4104mqa0pil_ss500_So Bishop Richard Williamson, Holocaust-denier and recently unexcommunicated Catholic bishop, has decided to look into rumors of genocide around the time of that whole World War II thingee. You see, after reading the Leuchter Report, Wiliamson became convinced that the whole gas chambers story was just that — a story.

Never heard of the Leuchter Report? Do I have a movie for you — Mr. Death: The Rise and Fall of Fred A. Leuchter Jr. It’s the age-old story of how a lovable electric-chair and gallows manufacturer was used by professional Holocaust-deniers to “corroborate” their version of history. What began, in Leuchter’s view, as a crusade against censorship became a complete personal and professional meltdown. Documentarian Errol Morris does a first-rate job of letting Leuchter tell his own story — and hang himself in the process.

 
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Posted by on February 10, 2009 in Better Late Than Never, The Next Thing You'll Be Telling Me Is That Wrestling Is Fake, Those Meds Will Not Take Themselves ..., Tin-Foil Hat Crowd, Wakey Wakey!, You'd Sound Smarter if You Stopped Talking

 

Next Person Who Asks ‘Who Is John Galt?’ Gets a Smack

07 Jan

150px-burgesswsThe more appropriate question is, Where is John Galt? And the answer may be “prison.”

I remember my Randian days, late-70s/early 80s, when libertarianism and the virtue of selfishness and the integrity of the individual were high on my list of values. I had read The Fountainhead and, yes, all of Atlas Shrugged, as well as several of Rand’s smaller philosophical works. I found her vision compelling, especially during the late Carter years, when collectivism was not only fashionable on campuses but heralded as the unified field theory of economic and social life by many on the Stupid Left. (I also had little use for religion back then — for any form of authority, for that matter.)

Here we are again, with free markets and deregulation in tatters, at least in the thinking of those who now wield political power. Big Government is not only back but deified. And Republicans have played their fair share in that turn of events. But what goes around, comes around. Big Government will become Big Brother and there will be a revolt, although unclenching the adamantine grip of the bureaucracies from the lives of citizens will take decades.

And then the free-market/entrepreneurial right will go nuts again, and people will be left homeless and jobless, and the wheel will turn another 180, and so on and so on …

I think I will take up Anthony Burgess’ prescient The Wanting Seed once again, what with its Augustinian and Pelagian antinomies.

 
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Posted by on January 7, 2009 in As Dead as the Macarena, Failure Is the New Black, I Don't Know Phases, Infinite Human Capacity for Stupidity, This Is Why I Never Leave My Apartment, Wakey Wakey!

 

Anglican Bishops Slap Labourites Silly, Threaten to Almost Blow Up Parliament Like That Guy Fawkes Guy

28 Dec

lancelot_andrewesN.T. Wright is among the five bishops who have started tearing the Labour government in Britain a new one, primarily over economic issues but also over the “breakdown of the family.”

The Rt Rev Tom Wright, the Bishop of Durham, said ministers had not done enough to help the poor.

“Labour made a lot of promises, but a lot of them have vanished into thin air,” he said. “We have not seen a raising of aspirations in the last 13 years, but instead there is a sense of hopelessness.

“While the rich have got richer, the poor have got poorer. When a big bank or car company goes bankrupt, it gets bailed out, but no one seems to be bailing out the ordinary people who are losing their jobs and seeing their savings diminished.”

No explicit mention of assisted suicide, euthanasia, or abortion, but there was this:

“I agree with the Conservatives that the breakdown of the family is a crucial element in the difficulties of our present society,” said Bishop Dow.

“The Government hasn’t given sufficient support to that because it is scared of losing votes.” He argued that Labour’s failure to back marriage and its “insistence on supporting every choice of lifestyle” had had a negative effect on society.

Unlike their Roman counterparts, Anglican bishops are far less comfortable issuing jeremiads on the life issues, but at least they’re challenging the left on something. Take what you can get, I guess.

 
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Posted by on December 28, 2008 in Better Late Than Never, It's Like a Miracle, Thank Goodness for Small Blessings, The Sacred, Wakey Wakey!

 

Mystery Worshippers Can Tell You Why Your Preaching Sucks, Your Parishioners Are Icy Hypocrites, and Your Mini-Muffins Taste Like Bat Guano

21 Dec

mw_350One more trend in the church-growth movement has been the employment of “mystery worshippers” — the sacred equivalent of the profane “mystery shoppers” who play at being mere consumers while actually scrutinizing the discrepancies in the pricing of products at various retail outlets.

I first encountered this bit of business over at the Ship of Fools site. Now it’s a franchise.

At least half a dozen consulting companies have introduced secret-church-shopper services in recent years, according to a Wall Street Journal report in October. The A Group, a Brentwood, Tenn.-based marketing firm for churches and faith-based groups, told the Journal that it conducts mystery-worshipper surveys at 15 to 20 churches a year – up from a handful five years ago.

“They see things we’ve grown accustomed to,” explained pastor Jim Hennesy of Trinity Church in Cedar Hill, Texas, when asked why his church sought the services of a “mystery worshipper.”

While such services have reportedly been beneficial to some churches, they have raised flags among some evangelicals and conservatives, with some warning that they will drive “spiritual consumerism” and divert the focus of churches toward strictly boosting attendance figures and retention rates.

Ya think? The only mystery worshippers we had in the 16th century were those spectral beings who wandered barefoot up and down the aisles asking for money and a good slapping to further them on their way to personal holiness. Once I hit one of these jackanapes so hard, he was immediately declared a saint by Pope Julius II. His feast day is February 29 so he will not get too puffed up with pride even in heaven.

 
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Posted by on December 21, 2008 in "Entertainment", Religious Kitsch and Other Regifting Ideas, The Sacred, Wakey Wakey!

 

New Yorkers Cope with Financial Crisis Through Anti-Depression, Anti-Anxiety Meds in Quest for Anti-Reality

15 Dec

failureIf at first you don’t succeed, medicate.

In September and October, prescriptions filled for sleep aids rose more than 7% to 366,870 compared to the same two-month period last year, according to data provided to Crain’s by Wolters Kluwer Health, a global provider of medical information. Prescriptions for anti-anxiety drugs rose 5% to 317,268, and anti-depressants were also up 5% to 926,654 in the two months in the city.

What happened to all those self-help, motivational books, tapes, and seminars? Why aren’t people cracking open their Anthony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, and Napoleon Hill tomes for comfort and correctives? Where’s the secret of  The Secret when you need it?

Why aren’t New Yorkers putting out to the universe their collective needs to be met by the Life Force?

Where’s 35 years of psycho-babble and New Age bull-hockey when you need it?

Down the potty, along with the economy …

 
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Posted by on December 15, 2008 in 2 + 2 = Whatever I Damn Well Say It Equals, Just Say No to Everything, Socially Acceptable Vices, This Is Why I Never Leave My Apartment, Those Meds Will Not Take Themselves ..., Wakey Wakey!

 
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