Temperance Lancecouncil, Anti-Hypocrisy Candidate, Pulls Ahead

Voting in Wilmington, Delaware.

… of Samm Tittle, the “One of Us for All of Us” candidate.

For those of you who are “pro-hypocrisy,” and so uninformed of Ms. Lancecouncil’s bid for the presidency, I give you several planks of her platform:

DEFENSE SPENDING
– Spending will increase 3-fold on the defense/military budget.
– Spending will be substantially increased in our space/NASA endeavors.

TAXES (CORPORATE/INDUSTRIAL AMERICA – GOVERNMENT’S ROLE IN PRIVATE ENTERPRISE)
– Tax cuts will not be rolled back to the most wealthy individuals in the society.
– Capital gains taxes will be reduced, based on applied tables.
– Taxes will or will not be raised, as warranted.
– Tax breaks and cuts will only be given to companies/corporations who are good, civic-minded corpoarations [sic] who work to recruit, hire, and train those off the welfare roles. (This, not at the expense of other traditional applicants.) Those who pay particular attention to urban and Appalachia areas will be considered most favorably.

The catch is the “applied tables.” I never know which tables apply to whom.

As for WOMEN’S PRODUCTIVE RIGHTS
– Current laws to remain in place for all adult women.
– Females between the ages of 16 and 21 years old shall be entitled to abortion-on-demand, with a limit of 2 within a 3-year period, under current state Medicaid / Medicaid financial guidelines. Parental notification is unnecessary, but these guidelines apply not to females under age 16yrs.

The emphasized bit may hurt her with the wilder set.

But I think she’s very good on homelessness:

HOMELESSNESS
– The homeless problem in America as we know it will end, as those who are mentally ill (via legislation) will be evaluated and appropriately housed.
– National vagrancy/tresspassing legislation will be enacted and enforced.

Note the balance.

I wouldn’t count Jack Fellure, the Prohibition Party candidate, out completely. After all:

Should I be elected to the Presidency, this Bible will be open on the desk in the White House Oval Office to Psalm 33:12, “BLESSED IS THE NATION WHOSE GOD IS THE LORD”, and also to II Samuel 23:3, “HE THAT RULETH OVER MEN MUST BE JUST, RULING IN THE FEAR OF GOD”. It shall never be closed during my tenure. I will take the inauguration oath of office with my hand on my Bible opened to Deuteronomy 28.

“It shall never be closed.” Like 7-Eleven. And Joe Biden’s mouth.

POSTSCRIPTUM: For those of you puzzling over how Mr. Fellure could have his Bible open to two verses from different books simultaneously, well, it’s obvious you do not know how to rightly divide the Word of God.

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4 thoughts on “Temperance Lancecouncil, Anti-Hypocrisy Candidate, Pulls Ahead

  1. So Ms. Temperance is not the temperance candidate…

    How would Mr. Fellure have his Oval Office Bible open to both passages; by folding the pages?

  2. Pingback: Election Day Special Mini Linkfest « Patriactionary

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