Who said that obesity is the greatest national-security threat facing our nation?

1. Dr. Mehmet Oz
2. First Lady Michele Obama
3. Rush Limbaugh
4. Matt, who lives in a refrigerator box by the southbound exit of I-95

If you answered No. 1, you’d be correct, with the First Lady concurring. (Matt rarely weighs in on politics, although clinical nutrition was his discipline until he was found eating clay at the University of Delaware School of Public Health.)

Are they right? Michele Obama’s follow-up, that the No. 1 disqualifying factor for military fitness is that teens are too fat to get through the recruiter’s door, makes a kind of sense, no? I mean, the statement is not as wacky as it first appears.

It’s the superlative that’s the problem. The greatest? Like more than the wackjobs who are killing our people in the Middle East? More than being in financial thrall to China? More than the fact that entire cities in this country are dying?

Now the Land of Oz is populated by thin, agile, ever-youthful cover models who eat human hair and defecate marigolds. So I get his racket.  But I would think the First Lady would have qualified the statement just a tad…

Also: How long before this becomes one of those meme thingees among the “humanists,” who never saw a human they didn’t want to “fix” or asphyxiate? How long before an obese person walking down the street becomes an object of ridicule or violence because of the carbon footprint they’re leaving, or their lack of “patriotism”? (As if they’re not already subject to name calling…)

Look, I think that given this administration’s policies, it’s probably wise to be trim enough to be able to flee on foot at a moment’s notice. And I don’t mean because of foreign invasion. You never know when somebody from the government is going to knock on your door and greet you with a hearty “You didn’t buy that — you only rented it” and start making off with your stuff for redistribution camps. I regularly train by running the mile with a flatscreen TV and an iMac strapped to my back, dragging a Radio Flyer filled with old DVDs and boxes of chocolate-covered Grahams, a modern-day Aeneus fleeing the flames of Troy.

Oh sure, my neighbors mock, miserable Blue State communists that they are. But wait…just wait…