The president-elect and VP take questions from a busboy at Applebees

There is nothing more demoralizing than reading the real-life answers American yutes have provided to exam questions. For example:

Question: “Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed?”

Answer: “At the bottom.”

Now if that child doesn’t have a future in government, I’m an uncle’s monkey.

Check out this wacky website* for more terrifying instances of the savage blow that has been dealt to the American I.Q. as a result of exposure to education. (Did Abraham Lincoln need an “education” to start the Civil War? Did MIke Tyson to star in his own one-man show? And why do giraffes figure in so many of these kids’ answers? What would Carl Jung have to say about giraffes? For that matter, what would Carl Jung have to say about Bridalplasty?)

So many questions, so little battery life…

*Some of the site’s content is not conducive to the chastity of the eyes, so focus, you deviated preverts!