There has got to be a better way to raise MSNBC’s ratings…

I so thought of this. In my mind. Which is why I have to start writing this stuff down. And not just in my mind.

Chinese researchers have unveiled a system that allows users to control drones with their thoughts. The technology was designed to help handicapped people, but could have ample applications in other fields as well.

A video posted to YouTube by researchers at Zhejiang University shows how the system, called Flybuddy2, works. And it appears that you don’t have to be a nuclear scientist to build one. All you need is an EEG headset with a Bluetooth connection to a laptop – plus a quadrotor Parrot AR Drone linked to the computer.

“The computer can receive EEG signals via Bluetooth and convert them to specific commands to control the AR drones through WiFi,” a presenter explains.

To get the drone to raise or to land, a user would need to “think left” hard. “Think left lightly” if you want to rotate clockwise and “right” if you want it to lurch forward. Give it a lift in the air by thinking “push.” And imagine clenching it if you want to bring it back down to earth.

OK, I am claiming dibs* on the following inventions, so if you read somewhere that the so-called “Chinese” have come up with their own version, you know they stole it from me:

• Mind-controlled mind-controllers who control their controllers … with their minds
• A 27th letter of the alphabet that can be used like a Joker, in the event of typos
• Pants for fish
• A military rank above general that is so elite, only Napoleon has ever held it, and even he didn’t know it
• Instead of the electoral college, a GED
• Pants for fish
• A universal remote that enables you to change the channels in large bodies of water
• An entitlement program no one is entitled to

* While the Chinese do not recognize most Western-style trademarks, patents and copyrights, they do respect dibs, the ancient tradition that dates back to the days of Siddhartha Gautama, who is said to have claimed dibs on the intermediate state between enlightenment and utter self-absorption, rarely distinguishable by the unenlightened but usually traded upon by the self-absorbed.