So Michael Dexter tries to off himself by swallowing 100 pills with a rum and cola chaser. His wife races him to the hospital. The ER personnel stick an IV in his arm to neutralize the damage — and in the process both save his life and do permanent damage to the arm the IV went into.

“I know they saved my life but if you went in with a heart attack you wouldn’t expect to leave with a limb you can’t use” …

He claims he has lost 75 per cent use of his arm and has been unable to find work since despite trying to get jobs, including a roadsweeper …

“I cannot even cuddle my wife with my right hand now.”

The man was minutes away from cuddling nothing but earthworms, mind.

He won $130,000 in a settlement against the hospital.

I blame the wife.